Romantic Analyzer Gifts

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

"I can't see it lasting!"

Bear Costume

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

Romantic Tree Carving

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

'First date with a logician - These venn Diagrams will save us a lot of time. We'll see where you fit in, where I fit in, and if any of it overlaps'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

Deconstructionist girlfriend

Perfect Match

Don & DixieKiss No. 274385

Single men in Tahiti

'Relax babe, that's me before the operation,'

'Wow - My kind of man.'

'I love your poetry, m'dear - it's very Ezra Poundish.'

Lovers in ruffled dresses

"I love it when you quote my blog back to me."

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

'Oh it's fantastic. It's my thirty fourth favourite sub-genre of progressive rock.'

Barbara Cartland

Gerald's first ever date remains on track.

"I’ll give you my answer in ... just ... one ... minute."

"You've taken those hideous curlers out, had a scrub up, shaved your legs. Looks like it's your lucky night babe."

Woman thinking - "But is it a real relationship?"

"If you really want to turn me on, nip out and get me some more chocolate."

'Of course I love her - but I'm not in love with her.'

Critics In Love

'I didn't know our relationship was SUPPOSED to be going anywhere.'

"Arrows won't work on him. Use a taser."

Lulu's Dating Service: Special! Adult summer camp...Dining, dancing & long walks on the beach.