Romantic Analyzer Gifts

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

"I can't see it lasting!"

Bear Costume

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

Romantic Tree Carving

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

It'll never work - you're LED and I'm plasma.

"I'll give you my unconditional love - on one condition."

'First date with a logician - These venn Diagrams will save us a lot of time. We'll see where you fit in, where I fit in, and if any of it overlaps'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

Deconstructionist girlfriend

Don & DixieKiss No. 274385

"I love it when you quote my blog back to me."

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

'Wow - My kind of man.'

The air conditioning in here isn't working very well. Why don't we keep cool by undressing each other with our eyes? ?

Lovers in ruffled dresses

'Relax babe, that's me before the operation,'

Intelligent Sexual Design

Single men in Tahiti

'I love your poetry, m'dear - it's very Ezra Poundish.'

Perfect Match

'Oh it's fantastic. It's my thirty fourth favourite sub-genre of progressive rock.'

7 Dwarves of Valentines Day

'Of course I love her - but I'm not in love with her.'

"If you really want to turn me on, nip out and get me some more chocolate."

Gerald's first ever date remains on track.

Barbara Cartland

"I’ll give you my answer in ... just ... one ... minute."

"You've taken those hideous curlers out, had a scrub up, shaved your legs. Looks like it's your lucky night babe."

Woman thinking - "But is it a real relationship?"

Critics In Love

'I didn't know our relationship was SUPPOSED to be going anywhere.'