
'Find out if she would have like me if I hadn't asked so many people.'
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'Find out if she would have like me if I hadn't asked so many people.'
'I sent out for everything.'
"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."
The best financial decision I ever made.
I really think I can handle this date on my own. Lemme ask you something. Would you trust me alone with a ybot 340? An Xbox 360? They changed the name? Okay. But you cannot hit on my date. I'm only here to help.
"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"
"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."
'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'
'He's a catch for any woman - there's so much to re-mould'
Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.
It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother. Why's that? House of Java .Net Cybercafe. Because how a man treats his mother is a good indicator of how he'll treat a girlfriend. That's why I created an app that calls your phone and displays a photo of you hugging your mom whenever a gorgeous lady is within three feet of you. It also displays a nice, sweet lady whenever you're within three feet of your mom.
"Listen to me, Nathan. Chicks love bad boys."
"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."
Colin could see that his competitor had obviously done his market research.
"Why won't you cuddle?"
"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."
Is this Randy the Love Doctor? Speaking. What ails you, brother? My wife doesn't have a job. The other night she told me it'd be nice if I helped out a little more at home. So I replied "hey, I don't ask you to come to my place of business and do my job for me." I see. Have you tried the "act like I never said it and wait for her to forget it" routine? Yes, sir. I also, tried the "don't-make-eye-contact-until-she-forgets-it" maneuver. I'm running out of ideas.
The Plinth Wedding Planner Co.
A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.
'Thanks for inviting me round to watch tv. Where is it?'
"I see marriage as a verb, he sees it as a triathlon."
Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.
"Oh darling! I just got your wonderful value added proposition! Of course I'll marry you!"
"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."
'Are you going to answer my text message or not?'
The date was going well. She was better looking, but he was about to gain the nutritional edge.
Dating the efficiency expert.
'It would never work, Tommy - you have all the growth funds and mine are all value...'
Separations.
'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'
Mergers or acquisitions.
'And that, in a nutshell, is why men don't understand women.'
"Helen, is it possible that we are using our child as an intimacy barrier?"
Single girl in wedding dress trying to catch a bachelor.
"Agreed. We'll reduce our arsenal of insults, jibes and grievances by one-third but will be permitted to stockpile them for use should the need arise."
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