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"Seen my Brad Pitt mask?"

"I’ve settled comfortably into middle-age while Barry has settled comfortably into Middle Earth."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

"Most of the time it's 'Me Tarzan, you Jane', until we get into the bedroom. Then he's all, 'You Tarzan, Me Jane'."

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

'Let's play doctor. You can be my malpractice lawyer.'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

"They're class action figures."

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

I'm tired of your games, Al. MY games? look who's talking! The guy with the role-playing hand puppets!

'How can you say I'm a bad actress, Tarzan?'

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

'Let's play doctor - you be the patient, you be the surgeon, and I'll be the malpractice-attorney.'

Kid in pedal police car pulling over a kid on a trike

"And what if I don't want to be Jack or Ennis?"

'We're playing 'mummy'!'

When we said we wanted you to have more fun training we didn't mean THAT much fun.

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

'It's simple, really. This line stays high and sets a good example for the other line.'

Big people always make a mess of things phobia: 'Let's play grownups. You'll be for busing and I'll be against it.'

'Little Nurse' daughter trying to distract Daddy so he cuts himself shaving

"Hey I know, let's play bored kids hanging around after school."

"The patient is ready for his injections, doctor."

'I still say I should be at the REAR end, Rodney!'

Fancy Dress Box

"These LARPERS are a bit more subtle and reality-based."

"Do you think we could stop using 'Julius Caesar' in the role plays?"

'...Just like Daddy!'

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

"Armstrong, have you seen my phone?" "Indeed I have, minion." "I’ve trained the café’s rodents to abscond with unattended cell phones, which I then return to patrons, earning their gratitude and loyalty." "You did not." "No, I didn’t. But it’s always been a dream of mine." "Very bad man." "Thank you for the opportunity to role play."

"Wanna play doctor?"

'I'm a vestal virgin.'