Role Model Analyzer T-Shirts

"Here's my report card, Dad, but before you say anything, I should warn you that Grandma gave me your fourth grade report card!"

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

"Now there's a relationship that's working!"

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

'I made my own list of My World's 100 Most Powerful Women!'

"I don't know...sometimes I think I don't spend enough time with them. What kind of role model am I?"

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"Behold! My greatest improvement to fatherhood. She cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids, burps, and farts. What's more...she self-identifies as a father!"

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

'Let's go to your place. I cook, I clean and then we can have a meaningful shag.'

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

Statue of Female Executive

"Will the role of wife call for any nudity?"

"Gracie, Frida Kahlo was a controversial figure... She was a strong independent woman...but she also had the courage to be different and unique."

“I don’t mind doing the dishes every night—it gives me time to deepen my resentment.”

'Yes, I wanted a knight in shining armour, but I didn't know it'd be me doing all the shining!'

"In our little socioeconomic group, I've always taken care of the socio and John's done the economic."

"My name is Jose Hernandez, and my story begins when my parents moved from Mexico to the United States to work the fields. I would find my own special calling."

Intelligent Sexual Design

"I don't want to be a king like Dad - I want to be a pirate like Grandpa!"

'Except...That.'

"There's no way God ever intended man to shove a pillow into a pillowcase!"

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice, Lord Mayor of London.

'Of course I love her - but I'm not in love with her.'

"He must be very secure in his masculinity."

'...Just like Daddy!'

"Arrows won't work on him. Use a taser."

"If he can run for mayor, I bet I can be mayor some day too!"

"You seem calm above the surface, but underneath I feel as if you're paddling like hell away from me."

"Has it ever occurred to you that you might be my trophy husband?"

Hall of Fame

"I'm Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor!"

Lucy Bronze

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"