Rodent Expert T-Shirts

"Wait! Maybe they aren't just awesome bunk beds with cheese pillows!"

'Remember me?'

'Don't worry about getting lost, folks. These trails are all well marked. . . if I do say so myself.'

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

Caliologist

Miami Mice

"We fell for this last time remember..."

'Aw,hunting season is a cleansing time. A time to forget about my worries...'

'What makes you think we have a radiation leak?'

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'

Hazards of mouse painting

There's a lot of crying out there! Looks like we were gnawing on the internet cable...

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

Mouse Sidewalk Cafe

'Will you stop! You know that freaks me out!'

"Why do people talk about a rat's nest like it's a bad thing?"

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

'Most dogs chase cars, Sally but mine is into them!'

"I know the cat's away but why don't we watch a couple of boxsets, order a pizza and grab an early night."

Revenge of the Mice

'It's about that lizard you sold me four months ago.'

Sportscasters on the Savannah

Mouse operating computer with human 'mouse.'

'It's that bloody David Attenborough! It looks like one of us is about to die a gruesome, yet visually stunning death.'

Mice Cutting Up A Cat's Tail

"I remember the time a cat came down here. We scared the hell out of him."

Absolutely not! There's still a huge pile of sawdust on your plate and you haven't even touched your twigs yet... Until you do, there'll be no popsicle sticks for you, Lionel.

"This stuff worked pretty well on me."

'That's right, the Princess kissed me by mistake: She didn't know the difference between a frog and a toad...'

Experimental Free Range Guinea Pigs For Sale.

Ophiologist

Helicopter rescues mouse in maze.