Riverside Raconteur Pillows

Making Things Pleasant.

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

He can lean back in contentment on cowslip banks and let everything wash over him.

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

"I can remember when a dollar was worth $47.32."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'the selling of seashells by the seashore was sluggish.'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

Non Thought For The Day.

"Hey! I've got audio but no visual!"

"I wrote a poem, even though I'm on vacation."

'At least they can't touch the village local' say two country gents. The pub now has a sign on the window saying 'This is now a smoke free pub, also no dogs or horsey types!'

"Trust me, come low tide everyone will want these seats."

Wow, I don't know why we don't sit down like this more often!

I'm a gangster rap fan too!

'Gee, Grandpa, you sure have a way with animals.'

Punch&Judy/Counselling

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

"We're a great team, Sash—you with your small and large motor skills, me with my spatial awareness and hand-eye coördination."

'Leader shy and angler wise I can put up with - it's the darn insolence that bothers me.'

A child with a parasol is blown off the Chain Pier in Brighton

"Okay, now we're too domesticated."

Fisherman's catch getting it's revenge

'Hello, Doc Barnes? I just got your bill. You've just bought yourself a cow.'

"I'll need a three iron."

Shakespeare at the beach ...

There is no limit to the amount of nonsense that men can talk about football.

How Platypuses Are Born

'Life on the farm used to be so... innocent. What's happened to us?'

Now we wait for the show to begin!

'Farm News' readers want to know about my childhood? Rather normal really: Lived in a pigsty, ate swill every day...'

'If you hold this shell to your ear you can hear the ARRRGH!'

It Actually Happened 'My neighbour is always bragging about her Manx cat....

"Daddy, the wave ate my sand castle!"