Rhyme Investigator Pillows

"Apparently the little miss was last seen sitting on a tuffet. If only we knew what a tuffet was."

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

How a poet works

"When Ed suggested 5 potato, 6 potato, 7 potato more, I suggested a vasectomy."

Poetry repairman

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

Great Poets of Catalogdom

Shakespeare or Bacon or maybe Marlowe.

"The steering-committee three are we. Run it by us, and we'll see."

"Never gets old: yes, 'See you in a while'..."

'This little piggy went to the doctor's office and went 'ouch, ouch, ouch' all the way home. I just made that up.'

"By the way, does anything other than 'trouble' rhyme with 'bubble'?"

'In conclusion, the supplier who can repeat this phrase fastest with least mistakes wins the catering contract...'

"Permission to speak in rhyming couplets, sir!"

"Great news, babe. I'm on the fall schedule."

'I really need to become a great poet while I still have time before I graduate.'

'Major poets' 'Minor poets' 'Free agents'

Forrest Gander

'You're a poet? I've got a great simile for you.'

'Darlin', what's an adjective for a two-timin', heart-breakin' outlaw that rhymes with iPod?'

"Okay, the mice can be blind, but if we introduce a carving knife, we'll have to use it in the third stanza."

4 Rules For 'Serious' Poets

"gibbledy gobbledy goo the blood ran away from the shoe... " Before becoming the no-nonsense detective that he is today, Joe would sometimes narrate his searches in rhyme.

"It's for weird minds - they're not wired like mine...oh! I'm a poet and didn't know it!"

"I can write beautiful poems, but they all rhyme with gin."

Humpty Dumpty is sitting on a wall, Below is a man with a boiling pot waiting for him to land in it, Man is licking is lips, he has napkin on and is holding a knife and fork,

"My libido?...What the hell does this even mean?"