Revenge Prankster Pillows

'No, it's not number four either, but he does look like my ex-husband. Yeah, let's go with number four.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

"My biggest weakness? I'm a perfectionist."

'I could eat you.'

Opera singer singing to her partner who is wearing a gas mask on due to her bad breath.

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Our company needs a tougher image. So from here on out we'll answer the phone with the greeting, 'what the hell do you want?!'

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"Mum can you come home quick, dad's started to make an exhibition of himself again!"

A faulty part from an independent supplier leads to the creation of a multibillion-dollar sports medicine profession.

'What do you mean you can't find the key?'

'Looks like someone got their bags mixed up at daycare drop-off.'

Thank you for not making faces during teleconferences with the boss.

'Interesting resume, would you mind if I kept it overnight? I'd like to take it home with me...and scare the living daylight out of my kids.'

"Personally, I don't think the company's CEO and CFO should be making decisions by rock- paper-scissors!"

Ref shows footballer green card.

Driver sees man in front of church with sign: 'Fell Asleep and Wet the Pew': 'Huh - a church that's into public shaming.'

'I think the meeting went reasonably well until he threatened to call security.'

Another reason why a high school diploma is not enough.

'Okay, this is the scene where the bear becomes a parachute.'

'See, I told you this electric fence would come in handy.'

An artist waits to ambush an easel

Work stress.

'I warned: Play a sloppy game and, come Monday, there will be hell to pay during practice.'

Avoid, Liabilities, Assets.

This looks unusual, but these things have a mind of their own.

"Student unicorn"

Snowman in the Freezer.

He's just discovereed that our £450,000 blog rebuttal campaign was directed against a 12 year old in swindon using his mum's computer.