Retro Diner Devotee Gifts

In a coal miner diner, customers have fainted from the fumes.

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

Diner.

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

Diner

"I'll have the egg-yellow omelette."

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

I used to eat plenty of natural foods, but then I found out that most people die of natural causes.

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

'How would you like your toast?'

"Eggshell in omelette make Hulk angry!"

"The Halloween Special is the pork and kraut. It'll come back and haunt you."

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

'Gasview Hotel' - 'Dinerview Gas' - 'Motelview Diner' - 'Hiwayview Suites'

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

"A votre sante!"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I'll have the prayer breakfast."

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'Flipping pancakes.' 'Waiting with a net.'

"So, you folks see anything you'd like?"

Breakfast special: Eggs Benedict Arnold, $2.99: 'Yesterday's Eggs Benedict'

Mom's Diner - Thanks for not talking about your father.