Retirement Reflector Gifts

"I fondly remember the time before the money ran out."

Retirement...Retirement...

"Tireless worker? Well, when I was young, yes, but not anymore I can tell you..."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Pete Townshend Vineyards

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"And we will absolutely start lending again as soon as we finish building our debtors' prison."

Republicans and Democrats debate while the US economy drowns.

'Less spare change under the cushion is my leading economic indicator!'

The ground cracking beneath a banker's feet because his bonus is so big and heavy.

'I think we're losing sight of our roots.'

'Control tower, we're having difficulty taking off....'

'Can you remember where you were when you first realized you were full of crap?'

Wolf Watching the Sunset

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

Rats Flea a Sinking Ship

Poet beside a (literally) babbling brook.

'All my life I've made the wrong choices. When opportunity knocked, I bolted the door.'

'A cocoon? Boy, he is having a mid-life crisis!'

When can you get rid of the crutches? Doctor says now, lawyer says not yet.

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

'I recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me...so I'm stepping down.'

"Look, Dad, I can explain my report card... Maybe I'm not the best student in the world...maybe I'll never be as good as you want me to be... Maybe..."

"I've been to the office..."

'If you just keep harping on the *#@!! results, you'll never be able to see what a perfectly sound economic theory it was.'

'We've all read the report cover to cover. Anyone read all that stuff in the middle?'

Would be interested in a job inspecting mirrors? I could see myself doing that.

"What's that look? C'mon, you're scaring me!"

"I'm not a guru. I just came up here until the stock market goes back up."

'It's middle age spread.' 'I can't believe I'm not thinner.'

'There's something to be said for being in the lowly 1-percent group in today's economy...right?'

"Everything I have, son, I have because your grandfather left it to me. I see now that that was a bad thing."

Institute for Advanced Hindsight - Research into what should have been.

"Someday I want to be rich enough to get rid of everything and live like a monk."

'I'm writing my diaries.' 'Neither am I.'