Retirement Aspirant T-Shirts

'I can't wait to retire so I don't have to be nice anymore.'

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

"You're doing great, only thirty-one more years to go."

"I'm telling you, those are not abs!"

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

Waiting for retirement.

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

'Do you have one with the number 401k? under the law averages, it's bound to be winner.'

Best Places to Retire

'Gen-Xers in their retirement years.'

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"I've thought about retiring, but there's a great deal of gravity under this chair."

"We've made $7.50. Can we retire yet?"

Greetings from VARICOSE VILLAGE, a Florida golfing community featuring a shopping mall, restaurants and hospitals.

'I have the result of your cost-benefit analysis. You should have retired four years ago.'

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

Saving for Retirement.

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

"I'm retired now - since I sold my 'know when you're naughty or nice' technology to NSA last year."

"Do you call this a business plan?"

"And this financial plan is specifically designed for people who know their retirement -- IF they get one -- won't be half as good as their parents' retirement, and are really steamed about it!"

'I'm retiring, to spend more time with my family of mutual find investments,'

If I could sell my experience for half of what it cost me I could retire.

"What the hell did you do with your day before I retired?"

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

'Ask me about my portfolio.'