Retired-in-spirit T-Shirts

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'I'm just not as ambidextrous as I used to be.'

"Your brow is definitely more furrowed than it used to be!"

"Clive used to be an astronaut."

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

'I want to give my children all the things I never had. Then move in with them.'

Too old to rock'n'roll now, Sir?

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

"The nest may be empty, but our drinks are full."

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

'I planned to go to work, cancel my appointments, kick back and just relax...then I remembered I'm retired.'

"I'm retired now - since I sold my 'know when you're naughty or nice' technology to NSA last year."

'Now that the price of gold is up, we'd like to have your retirement watch back, Boggs.'

'Sure, I remember using carbon paper. Does that carbon date me?'

"Come on, be a sport! The cliffs are lined with kids and bus-loads of retirees: let's give them a breaching display to remember!"

The F.B.I.'s Least Wanted.

'When 900 years you reach, retire, you will not.'

"We'll go for a nice space-walk later on."

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

"I'll be on the porch, pushing ninety."

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

'Introducing one of our top salesmen despite his old age. . .'

Man sleeping with newspaper at gentlemen's club

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

"I once loved a parade."

'I see the SAGA talent scouts are here.'

"...but after they hired Vanna White instead of me things really got interesting."

Dun spellchecking.

'At last you can put your feet up and concentrate on worrying about your pension.'

Another use for retired sumo wrestlers: Roundabout ahead.

Old man in rocking chair playing golf