Resume Builder Pillows

"Are all these letters of recommendation from your mother?"

'I get out in sixty days -- I guess I better update my resume.'

'Why is your resume copyright protected by online-resumes.com?'

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

'Impressive résumé. Any character references, mom?'

'I didn't know you could get an actual DEGREE in junk science!'

'You don't have much of a work history, do you, Mr. Laren?'

'Summited Mount Everest, did you? Was that just the one time?'

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

"Humility is a virtue, but not on a resume."

"Whatever happens, Jenkins, you'll always have your dancing to fall back on."

I'm going to put on my resume, fuel efficiency pioneer.

"My college degree may have gotten me this job..."

"My word, this really is impressive! Lots of people have a personal trainer but a personal wine advisor, wow!"

"Just your resume. We're not interested in the DNA testing."

"That's nice, but do you have any references other than your mom?"

"You've made a great effort but I feel you're not really the finished article."

"I'm sixteen years old and have been a babysitter for the past six months!"

'Impressive! You've accumulated the sins of a man three times your age.'

"There's something missing on your resume'..."

"A Ph.D. in particle physics, experience in aerospace and rocketry...of course I can juggle."

Hey, Twig! Why so blue? Everyone's into awesome stuff this summer. Math camps. Leadership programs. Studies abroad. A bunch of resume padders. Yeah, They're grinds. What about you? Nothing special. Just volunteering. Where? At a rain forest project in Costa Rica. That's look so lame on your college application.

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

'You have a very impressive resume, but don't worry, we'll drag you down to our level,'

'You bring an impressive array of bundled services to the table.'

'Where do I see myself in five years? Well, doing your job of course!'

"He's having a hard time finding work."

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

'I know my resume makes me seem overtrained, but I really wasn't paying attention.'