Restaurant Riddle Lover Pillows

"We're out of tuna fish, but the kid in table six said you can have a bite of his tuna sandwich."

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

'Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!' 'That's not soup! It's gumbo.'

'Can I get a box for this?'

M16 Code-breakers office

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

'How do you guys want your trans fatty acids prepared?'

"Linguini for two?"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

'How do you prepare your chicken?' 'We just tell 'em they're gonna die.'

"What works in the laboratory may not in real life."

'How d'you want your eggs - down your pants, over your head...?'

Three Pigs.

'I thought it was your figure you were supposed to be watching !'

Fast Food Restaurant

"Next riddle without looking it up, can you tell me which is the routing number and which is the account?"

Repletion.

'Maybe that'll teach you not to argue with the waiter over the bill!'

Food inspection results

'All right already! I get it! The baby needs a diaper change and it's my turn!! Yeesh!'

"What do you recommend today?"

'Caroline goes to her crossword compiling class on Thursdays.'

"I want a big-a*s salad."

Philosophy of Forestry: 'How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Walt? Roger? Steve? Anyone?'

"I love you, even though you still use a flip phone."

'What a relief to find out that fewer calories don't add up to longevity.'