Restaurant Culture Explorer Gifts

Waiter serving a man on a plate

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

Comedy Cafe

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

Your lobster was off!

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"I come here for the pepper."

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Pasta

Advanced footsie

'How is the water prepared?'

"How would you like your steak sir—really well done or raw? We've got a new chef."

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"