Restaurant Culture Explorer T-Shirts

Waiter serving a man on a plate

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

Comedy Cafe

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"I come here for the pepper."

Your lobster was off!

Advanced footsie

Pasta

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

'How is the water prepared?'

'In case of fire, don't panic, pay your bill then run like hell.'

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

"And exactly how is the peanut-butter-and-jelly prepared?"

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"

"How would you like your steak sir—really well done or raw? We've got a new chef."