Rest Stop Connoisseur Mugs

"Faux wood grain towel dispensers, matching toilet plunbers, herb scented urinal cakes, where's it all end, Stan?"

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"There goes our early night."

'If your name's not on the Liszt, you're not coming in.'

Bats with blankets.

'Openly sobbing, or non-openly sobbing?'

"What the heck did I do with that leftover turkey?!"

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

Man frozen in portrait pose.

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

"Don't make me send over the bad waitress."

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

Moliere

C Day Lewis.

Charles Dickens.

Bleak House

Cut out and keep your own Room Service.

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

'It has a zip-out lining in case of a mild winter.'

'I know, I left the electric blanket on too long.'

"Yes, you could have cooked it, but you didn't."

All set for the big sleep, Frank? I'm getting there. I've been storing up fat for the winter. And how about Ernie? He's trying something different this year. He's got wi-fi, a game console and virtual reality googles. He's going to cybernate.

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

"I've always been a gnome body."

The 'I'm Almost Finished With War And Peace' Bookmark

Hi, my name's Pam and I'll be your paramedic for the evening.

'I'm taking the leftovers home, so suggest something my dog will enjoy.'

"Remember when all we had was lots of little pillows?"

Sock Without Partners Sock Hop

Sergei Rachmaninov

When feud becomes best seller! Moby Dick vs Herman Melville!

'Remind me - have you slipped into something more comfortable, or out of something more comfortable?'

"Oh, I was looking for something with a little more hay."