Resolution Tracker Pillows

'Now Gordon's New Year's Resolutions have gone missing'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

"It's all a matter of planning...."

'OK. Lose weight, stop smoking, get fit, get a better job, spend more time with the kids, cut back on the booze, be better with money and buy a speed boat.'

Mediation Process

Great doing business with you. I look forward to next year.

Explorer with enormous magnifying glass.

"My New Year's resolution is to lose thirty-eight thousand pounds."

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"

January Joiner

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

NHS targets.

This year, Barry resolved to try new things and take more chances - starting tomorrow.

'Attention everyone! I'd like to make a rebuttal of the resolution my husband just made about my going SHOPPING.'

"Honesty, I saw a train yesterday"

The trick to losing weight is to eat a small portion and wait 10 minutes. By then your resolve has caught up with your appetite!

"My new year resolutions were to continue eating, drinking, smoking and gambling...and I've stuck to all of them!"

'Let it go. Get on with your death.'

'Weird ... the footprints just seem to end right here.'

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

My New Year's resolution is to be a better person. Very noble. I want to work harder to improve the planet. What's your resolution, mom? Pretty much the same. To be a better-looking person? Hey! It's planetary cleanup. Nan's Hair and Nails.

"I met all my projections. Thank goodness I set the bar low."

Their first New Year's solution was easy to fulfill: turning the foodchain.

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

My resolution this year? Getting in shape so I can lift my favorite snacks!

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

'You haven't seem my New Years Resolutions have you?...The one where I'm committing to 2,5000 billable hours and pulling in 6 major clients.'

Good intentions last a month on average

New years resolutions

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

"Do you have a one day a year membership?"

"Sure-fire weight loss program."