Reskilling Champion Pillows

"Okay, so I've outgrown my niche in Organizational Behavior. I'll re-niche."

'He's not talking yet, but his texting skills are excellent...'

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

'Do you want us to wait till the meat is completely burned or can we call the pizza service right now?'

"I'm so happy to be back in the workforce I'll never complain out loud again about Mondays."

The birth of junk mail.

'Work the jab! Move your feet! Attack, attack, attack! ...But be careful. He's got a human shield.'

Cardboard, Paper, Comics.

'Here's my mother's number in case I don't make it.'

Whaling boat with banner 'Save the krill'.

'With three teenage daughters the phone never rings twice in this house!'

'This beer is pale and tasteless.' 'Your glass is empty.'

'What do you think about renewable energy?'

"We rescued him form the research lab."

Turkey...cold turkey.

"I missed the meeting on employee theft. What was the takeaway?"

'If only texting was an Olympic sport.'

'You'll never win that contest -- you've never said anything in fifty words or less.'

Ring tossing

Recyclable Coffins

'The dog just texted, He's waiting for you at the back door,'

'I think it's about time we had a text, son.'

Real World

'I lost my cell phone three days ago and I'm still stuck in text mode.'

Job search

'Yes Peeves, I know our Terms and Conditions are virtually incomprehensible and very difficult for our customers to understand. It took our legal team almost six months to re-word them like that!'

"Twitter wars! Now that's for sissies!"

I Brake for Roadkill

"Good martini. My job's pressure cooker and this is my quick release valve."

"I'm the kind of person who likes to talk about the kind of person they are?"

'Mrs. Finnegan put me in the accelerated recess program!'