Chiseling Champion Pillows

I told you, when you chisel a statue, start at the top.

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

Family working together

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

'He's not here right now. He's out pumping iron.'

The Sculptor

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

Unbeknownst to many, the Frankenstein legend was in fact based on Albert Grimes, the mad tree surgeon.

Sculptor's chippings

'Bob likes to express himself through his art!'

"She leaves wooden-handled knives soaking in the dishwater all night long. Your Honor."

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

"I want an instant replay of you taking out the garbage."

"Hey, the last thing I want to do is annoy you. That's actually ninth on my to-do list."

"Honest, Dad, somethin's wrong with the lawnmower." "You look fine to me. When you finish the lawn and pullin weeds feel free to wash the car and paint the house."

"The last time we ordered take-out I was up all night doing laundry."

"I woke up early, took a shower, got dressed for work then remembered I don't work today."

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

Lumberjack:'TIMBERRRR!' Tree:'MURDERERRRR!'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

'I wonder how many board feet are in this tree.'

Sue believed that one day she would find her soul mate - and her missing sock.

Slept on the plane and now in horrible pain?

Dating Agency: "I am looking for a man whose hobbies are, washing up, dusting and ironing."

'Remember, I deduct one grade point for every splinter.'

"Yes, I can multi-task. Why do you ask?"

"Honest Dad, I was going to mow the lawn... But I can't find the lawnmower in here!"

Sculpting

"I'm helping Mom wash the dishes."

Sculptor with falling rocks sign.

"You must be married, and well trained."

"Hey - we could do with another light bulb. . !"

'Look out for the park ranger while Bernie and I chop us some firewood!'

Rodin's Block