Research Reflector Pillows

'We've all read the report cover to cover. Anyone read all that stuff in the middle?'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

"When it comes to loving someone, I never seem to get it right."

"Your mind is somewhere else." "My mind is somewhere else."

'I'm writing a novel using our marriage as inspiration. It's called, 'This Sucks'.'

'Don't take it the wrong way, we could always be friends'

"I love it when you quote my blog back to me."

"The perfect killing machine? Is that all I am to you?"

"Sorry Honey, I'll be about thirty years late for dinner tonight."

"Martin, did we ever get our freak on?"

He was a great dodgeball player. Who's in heaven now. He will be missed.

Dog barks at himself in a mirror.

"My dating life has come down to choosing between bad breath and bad credit."

Psychiatrist's Notice - THINK BACK

Are you getting enough "me" time, Al? Oh, more than enough, Doctor

"How is it that Mick Jagger still has the energy to be Mick Jagger, but you're exhausted just from being you."

'How does it make you feel when he doesn't acknowledge all the hard work you put into gathering?'

"Lucky!"

"For the experiencing self or the remembering self?" "That was nice."

Corona measures

'This babbling brook reminds me I should probably call my wife.'

"Sometimes I wish I went to a magnet school."

"I wish we had a diary room - someone who would listen to me."

"That's just my memory mattress."

"No land women want me, so I'm off to try my hand in the sea."

'Alice, call the emergency doctor! I just thought 'Hey, I've made enough money!''

'I think we're on different career paths.'

"Twenty years ago, I invited you in for a nightcap. I now retract that invitation."

"If I've got no messages how do I know I even EXIST!"

When can you get rid of the crutches? Doctor says now, lawyer says not yet.

"When I think about my mom, it hurts here."