Reporting Expert Pillows

'If you have anything of importance to tell me, for goodness sake, begin at the end.'

The Anti-Agent

Squeezing the Free Press.

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

"I see by your resume this would be your first time in a symbiotic relationship."

Giant pandas doing surveillance in a zoo.

Charities should investigate whether published reports are 'Misleadingly Positive'.

"For details on the bear market, here's a bear..."

"Wow...your resume is quite impressive."

Pull the udder one

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

Why do you hate the media?

"Trump vs Biden. Chiefs vs 49ers. On the brink of war with Iran. Didn't we do this all in 2020?"

'Your proposal is written with clarity and conviction. Send it up to legal for obfuscation.'

"What's important is that we learn from what we must never admit happened."

"Here are today's leading factoids, and I'm Skip Shumaker, spoon-feeding them to you!"

'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'

CCTV in church.

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

Cameron uncomfortable hanging out with his inquisitor.

Trump Overload

'You've been killing files again.'

'In a sentence or two, Gibbs.'

'OK, who moved the photocopier?'

A Journalist's Weapons

"Why don't we call you 'Deeper Throat'?"

"Skepticism, Jones? Tell me, how does that relate to journalism?"

"No word from the company – but, it's clear that this is a major spill."