Replay Ranger Gifts

'I can't wait to see the highlights on TV!'

Bitchbark Canoe

'What the... MOM! This isn't deer! It's a yucky tourist again!!'

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

New Guy.

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

'Look at that! Peanuts!'

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

Dog tries to obey No Dog sign

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

Garden pond: mosquito breeding ground

Hiking sign - Stop, pause, play, skip forward, skip back

Even for a mountain goat he's good.

The Canoga Forest - coming soon: The Conoga Desert.

'We're a protected species and an endangered speices, but when I see a person, I don't know if he's protecting us or endangering us.'

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

Danger Falling Leaves

Malfunctioning geyser

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Howard, but I'd like to go back to having an on-line relationship."

'Hmm ... wonder how much ivory fetches these days.'

That's actually the gorilla survival manoeuvre. . .

"Greta, look! The first dysfunctional family of winter!"

'Break glass in case of tangled antlers.'

'Some idiot's pulled the plug out!'

'Do you have your insurance information on you?'

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

(Maps to the Homes of the Steers) (Maps $ 100)

"True, it is 'organic.' It's also a dead squirrel!"