Remodeling Buff Gifts

"Would you like your custom blinds to get stuck on the left or on the right?"

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

Caution: Construction workers standing around and drinking coffee.

"We're going to build in Rhinebeck, once Steven finds the right brick."

'I WANTED to paint the room a shade of green, but gave up somewhere between chartreuse and citrine.'

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

Gerald Ratner's return

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

SupermarketAwful Market.

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

'The buildings are merging.'

'We're waiting for an estimate that doesn't make him do that.'

"Maybe we'd do better if we called ourselves 'baristas'."

'The client loves your work. Cut everything except for their logo.'

Our New Slogan: Make Money.

Turning 'Raw Hype' Into 'Pure Hype'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

Vincent Van Goth.

Office Furniture - Would you like to thump the table sir, to hear what it sounds like?

The Bargain Brand

"In the marketplace of ideas, we may not have the best ideas, but we have the best marketing."

How can you be so sure this is Farmer Phillip's Farm?

'It's not really rsutling, it's rebranding."