Remedy Believer Pillows

'Put the heating pad on it.'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

"Oh, puhleeese. No one's going to steal your idea."

"The Internet startup had only enough cash for one more day. But, miraculously, the money lasted for eight days, until more venture capital could be raised."

"Rescue someone; rescue yourself"

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

"Holy water, holy water...."

'No, your stock didn't split. The fact it's worth half of what it was yesterday is just an amazing coincidence.'

'2 chocolate truffles in the morning and 2 in the evening should cure your broken heart,,,'

'Fish and bread? That's it? Seriously?'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"Your recovery has defied all known science...so let's just keep this between ourselves!"

The Confessional: a bored priest listens to a confession.

'It's a medical miracle. According to your notes you should have been dead years ago!'

"As a confirmed hypochondriac, I rely on placebos to get me through the day."

Miracles on 34th Street.

'You had a good idea in our staff meeting yesterday. So, the church sent someone over to witness the miracle.'

'Hey, Naomi, remember last week when you said nothing short of a miracle could save MicroTechnoCom from bankruptcy?'

'I might be able to get you off if a chain of near miraculous rulings happen to occur.'

"The doctor says your injury is not serious...we're going home."

'There's nothing wrong with you that a couple placebos won't cure.'

"Relax! He's in good hands!!"

'...and despite DNA predictions of incompatibility...'

Moses Uses God-Given Powers To Protect His Sandcastle

"Lord, if my prayers are pleasing to Thee, please confirm by fax."

Canadian Jesus

"He tested positive to Lourdes water!"

God's Miracles.

Jesus Fish

"Ok, I'm confused. – Which is it? Wear the mask or shed the mask?"