Reluctant Runner Pillows

'This getting fit is killing me.'

"The only thing I like more than running is everything else."

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

'I went jogging this morning - actually got as far as the front gate!'

"Back from your jog already? I thought you were going to go for the burn."

"At least I don't need to waste time inventing reasons not to go on a parkrun anymore."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

"Shhh! I'm hiding from Mistress who wants to go on a walk! It's cold and raining outside: no way I'm wearing that stupid coat again!"

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

'How's the water, dear?'

The Boys of Indian Summer

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'...I don't want people to get the impression that I'm so passionate about my work that I'll be taking it with me!...'

"I have a whole closet full of running clothes I never wear."

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

'Liquor will solve this problem, chief!'

Stop staring at that screen saver!

Airline concerns.

"Enjoy my first day at school? You mean there'll be others?"

I just don't trust those self-flying brooms yet.

'Well you were warned about the dangers of sedentary lifestyle.'

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

'Derek's a big fan of resisistance workouts. He always resists working out.'

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

What would it take to get you to start running? Frankly, doctor, it would take someone chasing me.

'He stated jogging to work.'

Hunting - Man asked to go hunting by his wife

'Who cares where Waldo is?'

Man Readig Paper

Summer Reading