Reluctant Philosopher Pillows

'I'm trying to broaden my mind...'

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

'Wake up! You should be worrying about our investments!'

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

'Great! The world ended and I slept right through it!'

'I failed history again. I guess those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

Telling Self to Buzz Off

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

"You'll be pleased to know you haven't got any homework this evening."

'It has nothing to do with relativity. He's trying to figure out his cable bill.'

"What did I learn in school today...I learned I don't like school!"

Quiet!

"Listen up - today is the first day in the rest of the coronavirus crisis!"

"Son, we didn't spend a fortune on your education so you can 'just be yourself.'"

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"I keep forgetting it's not Christmas,"

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'Who cares where Waldo is?'

Man Readig Paper

Summer Reading

'I'm going, but if school didn't have a 'Kids Get In Free' policy...'

Interior Monologuist

'You were talking in your sleep again.'

'What do you mean, 'Land Ahoy!'? We're just trading Fishing Season for Hunting Season.'

'I'm not counting the days 'til school's out. I don't do math unless they make me.'

"Can he call you back? He's meditating."

"For Christ's sake, Bob, tuck your shirt in."

"Frank's trying to outreach to people who only come to the library to use the washroom!"

'Darn! - Don't you hate it when you forget what you were meditating about?'

Do you think it's too late for me to go to law school and position myself for an appointment to the Supreme Court? Yes, unfortunately. You'd have to go back in time and start preparing early. By that I mean WAY back. As in you'd have to ensure that the cells that formed you had genes that would give you intellectual curiosity, above-average intelligence, and ambition. But you do still have time to become a layabout. You seem to have prepared very well for that. What? You'd still get to wear a ro