Reluctant Helper Gifts

"Baldo, I need you to take this out to the dumpster."

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."

"The holidays are finished George, get over it!"

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'...I don't want people to get the impression that I'm so passionate about my work that I'll be taking it with me!...'

John was bck from extended leave, but he hadn't quite got in the swing of things yet.

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

Stop staring at that screen saver!

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"Enjoy my first day at school? You mean there'll be others?"

Man ignores DIY book and instead reads book entitled: 'Get someone else to do it'.

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

"Should I fix it or call it a water feature?"

"The boss is on a working vacation and we're on a nonworking vacation."

"My art speaks for itself."

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'Dang it Sharif, I told you we shouldn't built the jacuzzi on an ancient bee burial ground.'

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

'I'm glad she's relaxed, but I'm pretty stressed out.'

'Don't worry, Mom - I'll do my book report during the next commercial.'

The Imperfect Hostess

"Mom, don't believe it. It's Fake News."

"I can catch up with all the chores my wife wants done over the Labor Day weekend."

"This could be a job for....Slothman. Nahhh."

This week, House Manager Blowviatt has been asked to avoid the appearance of playing to the cameras.

"Say, Honey, I forgot to tell you that the Snootmyers called...they'll be over for drinks in twenty minutes!"

"For Christ's sake, Bob, tuck your shirt in."

We're actually looking for someone who just wants to get out of the house.

Knowing that he was holding yesterday's 7 million lottery ticket,,,

"I really should call my mother — I just don’t want to talk to her."

'The good news is, I've got no more trouble with my stupid boss and grumbling customers. The bad news is, our company is insolvent and I'm jobless.'

"Dr. Garcia is ordering to make a lot of changes in my life."

'I love Saturdays. . . why couldn't this happen on Monday and ruin a work day?'