Reluctant Gamer Pillows

"I think we need to spend some time apart."

Golfing Boss

'What do you mean I don't take time to smell the flowers?'

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

The Boys of Indian Summer

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

Mental To-Do List

"Baseball is boring."

Hot flashes

'Liquor will solve this problem, chief!'

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

'I must confess I admire people like you...Executives brave enough to say 'No I need a holiday.' I don't care if my clients look elsewhere, I'm not going to sacrifice my leisure time to climb the slippery pole to the very top...'

'Derek's a big fan of resisistance workouts. He always resists working out.'

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this committee.'

Hunting - Man asked to go hunting by his wife

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

Burning the midnight oil again?

"I wish you wouldn't take your enjoyment so hard, Ed."

"Every year it's the same story...dangerous situations. Slippery slopes. Inescapable traps. Horrible creatures. But I trudge forward because no matter what...it's hard to avoid the first day of school."

"This could be a job for....Slothman. Nahhh."

"I'm writing a book on everything I don't know about technology. It's a lot longer than I originally thought."

"The long wait for greatness to be thrust upon one."

"I was celebrating Hump Day and ended up with Throw-Out-Your-Back Thursday."

'You can't do this to me, Arlene! -- I'm not the outdoorsy TYPE!'

Man on desert island with a chess set.

'He loves all sports, he can sit and watch others do it all day.'

"Sorry, I can't make it tonight - I have too good a parking sport."

Trying to get kids into sports

"For Christ's sake, Bob, tuck your shirt in."

"We just weren't compatible.Her body-clock was telling her to settle down and have kids,and mine was telling me that the pub was open."

'What? You mean I ran all the way here and got all that exercise for nothing?'

"Ed's practicing his stand up routine. No, he's not a comedian...he's just standing up!"

Obscenity-recognition software. It's for people who hate computers, but have to use them.

"No, I'm not interested in a free ski weekend. Please take me off your call list."