Religious Upbringing Appreciator Pillows

"God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, and what the heck, bless my little brother Charles, too."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

Finger puppets in church.

Jesus and the Peeps

Proud mums.

'I'm not sure about these, but I'll try them out on the focus group.'

"I think I'm ready to go forth and multiply."

Tourist viewing indian rain dance carries open umbrella.

"Sorry. I thought it was a typo."

"But why would anyone, especially the meek, want to inherit the earth?"

"That isn't allowed either."

Two friars ringing bells

"How do you tell the Son of God He's got spinach in his teeth?"

"It's bad news Brother Thomas, he's decided to change the font"

The Ancient Tea Ceremony of Astoria

"The trouble with children is they don't act like adults."

'4th Sunday before Easter... and 5th before my holiday!'

Nadal's bottles

'Hey, sorry about that! Here, let me pick you one without a worm in it.'

'I remember baptising him when he was a baby, and that was the last I saw of him until he rolled in here today.'

'Which father is the father?'

Indian Face Painting

"I'm not surprised that it's a bad school report. Statistics indicate that children get their intelligence from their fathers!"

"OMG, a right wing, ultra conservative, radical religious nut."

"That's just sick."

'If I'm born again, will I have two birthdays a year?'

"Three kings and we still can't get a room upgrade?"

'I've sussed this work/life balance...'