Religious Festival Goers Gifts

Shavuot - Like!

"I'm having my entrails read."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

R.C.I.A.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"Every once in a while he gets nostalgic for Woodstock."

Oh look, Marv - We're just in time for the running of the fools!

Nativity Scene on the Underground

Passover Plague

"First of all, I'd like to thank all of the little pumpkins who made this night possible."

'What does Easter mean to you?'

Entertainers - Clowns and Jugglers. No Fools Kept in this van Overnight.

Joe's Bar: Sorry, closed to the public due to on-premises 'Bar Mitzvah'.

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

Michelangelo: God Creates the Rabbit

"The Kitmans in 12-B. Tell them Elijah is here for the Seder."

Train back from Glyndebourne.

"Ah! What a glorious day to be dead!"

'We've reached very dry land, captain.'

Congregation

"I couldn't decide what to give up for Lent, so I gave it all up."

Olympic Catering: 'A small coffee please.'

'Hey! I hope you got clean feet - we have to swim in this.'

Rabbit With Flower.

Christening

'That's my slogan, you lousy thieveing creep!'

'Does anyone have a light, please?

"Unbelievable—Lohri's not even over and already the stores are putting out their Baisakhi stuff."

"There's a man at the door collecting for Jesus...."

Succat Shalom

"While Ralph was fine with discussing climate change in church, he often wished it would focus more on turning down the damn thermostat."

Four Questions of the Seder

"Some cruise! It rained for the entire trip!"

"Let's hope it doesn't rain!"

Seder in the Age of Corona Virus