Relaxed Renegades T-Shirts

"Whenever they low, I get high."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Hiding the electronics.

"The nest may be empty, but our drinks are full."

How Do You Like My Moseying Along?

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

Wearing bras in 2020.

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

Now entering: Space. Population - wouldn't you like to know.

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

"But you told me you were on gardening leave, so why can't you come and help me in the garden?"

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

"Whaddya mean line ball? The ball was out! O.U.T.! You blind or something?"

"I see here it's been quite a while since your last performance review."

"Declared Victory Garden"

"You gotta love the mpg we're getting!"

Old man in rocking chair playing golf

Martha Stewart at Home.

'I outsourced toymaking and delivery, fired the elves and moved my headquarters here to the Cayman Islands.'

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

'I don't see how you were able to work for so many years. Since you've retired you can't do a thing.'

He kicked the door down --- It must not be Opportunity.

'Saturdays in paradise.'

'No need to put my details in darlin'... You're the girl for me!'

"I've crunched the numbers in your retirement account. It's time to figure out who will be wearing the mask and who will be driving the getaway car."

"I had to bite him once, but now I always get a great table."

'Things have been pretty quiet around here since the capt'n got into online piracy.'

'I just started at the bottom and I like it there!'

"Daddy? How do you keep your hands so soft?"

"I faked your New Year's resolution."

Shouting.

"I'm going to have to cut your walk short today."

"You do realize that I'm retired too?"