Relationship Reflections Gifts

'We would split up, but neither of us wants to be left alone with the baby.'

"I'm not in the mood, Edward."

'You keep asking me to change when I can't remember what from.'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"My monthly screen time went up from 62 hours to ‘Holy #@!*’."

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Do You Know It's Anniversary

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

The Map of the Human Heart

'Well I wouldn't have to fake orgasms if you didn't fake foreplay!'

"You'll note that the card isn't signed so my declaration of undying love isn't legally binding!"

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

"Why can't you just learn to floss like other men?"

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

"I've learned something about you tonight, Alan. You say 'chowmein' when you mean 'lomein'."

"Why won't you cuddle?"

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

"When it comes to loving someone, I never seem to get it right."

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

'Sorry Henry, but I'm looking for something a little more permanent.'

"I like an attentive lover, but these feedback forms are ridiculous."

'Of course the physical side of your relationship's broken down, you've let yourself go!'

"We're only staying together for the sake of our marriage guidance counsellor."

Well, if being married isn't grounds for divorce, I'd like to know what is"

"Mom, this is Sarah, the friend I was telling you about."

'I've just realised where we went wrong.'

"Marriage is driving me crazy and she's my designated driver!"

"Your mind is somewhere else." "My mind is somewhere else."

"Trust me. It's no big deal. I'm even tuning you out right now."

Tunnel of like.

'You do make me laugh, Ron, but a relationship can't survive on laughter alone.'

"I think I know where the passion in our marriage has gone."