Relationship Adventurous Pillows

'Let's put some magic into marriage. Let's get a divorce and marry someone else.'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Romance

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

"Our therapist couple be so proud of us now."

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

The perfect man

Cupid and parachutists.

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

Wife takes husband's place in the pub

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

Pete never wanted the fame that came with being a national symbol...he just thought it was a good way to meet girls.

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

Single men in Tahiti

"She said don't forget the straw."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"The lunch, grab the lunch!"

Russian Dating.

Mate Mart

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'When I said we should see other people, I didn't mean starting tonight.'

'You don't like bananas? You don't like climbing trees? My dear, why have you hid this for all these years??'

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

'My mother always told me if it ain't broke, date it.'

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

First Date

Borrow the Bag?

"That's the worst pickup line I've ever heard!"