Regulatory Ruminators Pillows

"To meet the government requirements, I'm passing the extra costs to the consumer and our employees."

'You forgot the product label.'

Speeding Forklift

"If I go to the party alone, will I be able to leave when I want? But then, there's always the possibility that I will get stuck talking to someone. I can't shake the problem is me. What if no one else likes me? I'm the only one being critical... The issue is I'm not enough and it's really so huge." "The over thinker"

"In the room the women come and go. Talking of Michelangelo."

"The bank examiners are here, oh!...I see you already know."

"I'm afraid the umbrella constitutes an enclosed space and must be taken down."

'They're doing their tests now?

'I love doing surprise inspections.'

Equality in sexes leads to increase in insurance costs.

'KEEPING UP in practice simply means knowing which drug the FDA has withdrawn.'

"I really like smart women."

U.S. Department of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms

'Could you bring me the new investment regulations you downloaded yesterday?' 'It's still downloading.'

Licensing Officer

'Have you got something that says, 'I've got a headache?''

When the feds combine offices: US department of commerce & immigration...importing, exporting, deporting

"Anything to accompany a stale marriage?"

'We're pleased to announce we're doing a government study to find out just who regulates the electric industry.'

"Great news! The Fed possibly confirmed that a possible rate hike is possibly possible!"

"My psychiatrist advised me to pay taxes quarterly. That way my seething resentment is spread evenly over a year."

In Case of Accidents

"I see you're on a date at the moment but perhaps later we could meet for a latte."

'Your 401k doesn't look a day over 20.'

"Just like he did when he was alive the lazy sod!"

"He doesn't seem to be accepting retirement too well."

'Yes, most humans call us pests or vermin, but a few of them love us as pets...'

"Relax! They'll be gone soon. . ."

'Gail, my dear, please don't talk about sex - my God this is a restaurant!'

'Let me just check the code book.'

"So make me an offer."

"There's a moving truck backing up to our loading dock. Maybe they're delivering the government regulatory guidelines."

'But aren't hand grenades supposed to be dangerous?'

I'm here about the inspecting