Regulation Navigators Pillows

'They've dealyed our IPO so long that we've gone from intending to open a chain of pre-schools to opening a chain of nursing homes.'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

US v.s. Tech Giants

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

'That's my 'job security' barometer.'

"Procurement and their stakeholder journey down the procurement pathway... Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

'We can't cut entitlements for federal employees. We're federal employees.'

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

"Uh oh, here come more regulations."

"The bad news is that we've had to cut most of the services. . . The good news is that we can now tell people in 23 languages what we don't do anymore!"

In/Out.

'The new regulations arrived earlier today.'

'Federal Bureau of Technological Compliance - May I help you?'

"Our first target is to work out what our target is."

"Oh shut up."

People being buried under enormous falling tax credit forms.

'My ambition is to discover the Great American Loophole.'

"I'm sorry, but I don't make the rules around here. But I'd be happy to connect you with any number of people who think they do!"

"It's funny how two intelligent people can have such opposite interpretations of the tax code!"

'We're to spend more time engaging with patients on a more compassionate 'human' level...and here are the guidelines on how to do it!'

"No, this is the department for obfuscation, hindrance, confusion and prevarication...you want the department for sophistry, incomprehension, fudging and evasiveness!!"

IRS: I Survived the Audit.

'Can you get out and parallel park for me? I'm not good at it.'

'Yes, it is a stressful job.'

Council tax inspector notes dog kennel: 'Clearly, this property has its own entrance.'

"She used to shop until she dropped, but with online shopping, we lost that protection."

"It's a 300 page government questionnaire about cutting back on bureaucracy."

Pick a direction.

"We have all kinds of Regulatory Guidelines floating around."

"You're not allowed to plead 'no contest'."

"Simplified application form? This IS the simplified application form..."