Refrigerator Philosopher Pillows

"My son has a magnetic personality. That's why he's always hanging on the refrigerator door."

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

Spot the Difference - God/Uncle Sam

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

"The corner ledge is reserved for senior management."

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

'I have an MBA, but I've never MBAed.'

'Miss Fogarty, I'm not having any fun.'

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

"This is one of her more important paintings from her early period."

"I noticed a few browns."

"Most of us get around the company motto by saying 'No can do' instead!"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

"Being my own boss sounds fun but I wouldn't be able to motivate myself."

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

Business man sees himself as a shark

'My - You've matured, my dear.'

Warning. Objects in mirror my bear no relation to reality.

'Push'n 50, but ya still got it!!'

'Just tell me. You don't need to drag that out every time I ask how I look.'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'Have you ever noticed that as you get older, your thin things get thicker and your thick things get thicker?'

Friday is Wet Khakis Day!

"Bear with us, will you? -- We're having technical difficulties over here."

'I'd trust you anywhere - I think!'

"This is a tough place to work..."

"Must be the new philosophy teacher."