Reformed Coffee Lover Gifts

'I kicked the coffee habit!'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

Burning the midnight oil.

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"Give me all the caffeine you have."

"Man's best friends."

Back to work...

'I need to talk to you about the coffee fund.'

"I remember when we first met you were an exhausted young doctor! Now you're an exhausted middle-aged doctor!"

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."

"I'm losing my patience with you."

Allegro con molto espresso

"AHHHH, MORNING!"

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

You've Had Enough!

Name one serious woodworker who doesn't use state of the art kit. Thomas Chippendale.

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"I'm trying to lure in Generation X-ers. They're the new sandwich generation. They're sandwiched between caring for their kids and caring for their parents. So they drink lots and lots of coffee."

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"I'll have another Rob Roy and a cup of coffee for my friend here."

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

Countervailing Clichés.

Non-Power Breakfast

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."