Reflective Sipper Gifts

'Thinker's drinker.'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

Sparkling Water

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

Beach flirting

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

A very fine vintage

'Gee, mom, you know I want to visit - I'm just so darned busy.'

"Detox is two doors back, bro' - this is retox!"

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

Complaints Desk

Velvety. And so was the wine.

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

"'60 Minutes' is on."

'Will you stop yelling save the whales and finish you pina colada?'

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

Can I get you another coffee?

'I told you to sip it!'

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

"Transitioning from home to office again is more difficult for some than others."

'Kids, those video games are going to desensitize you.'