Reflective Sipper Gifts

'Thinker's drinker.'

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'I had my attorney draw this up. It states that if I choose to rise, I don't necessarily have to shine.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Sparkling Water

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

"...Stop complaining if it wasn't for the mosquitoes you wouldn't get any exercise at all!"

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"My inner child wants to have a playdate with your inner child."

Beach flirting

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, fell, and retained a brilliant attorney."

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

"I'm a retriever but I prefer 'Go-Getter'."

Complaints Desk

"Detox is two doors back, bro' - this is retox!"

A very fine vintage

'Gee, mom, you know I want to visit - I'm just so darned busy.'

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

'Will you stop yelling save the whales and finish you pina colada?'

Velvety. And so was the wine.

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

"'60 Minutes' is on."

"I'm feeling less stressed since I set my biological clock back an hour."

"Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here."

'I told you to sip it!'

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

Can I get you another coffee?

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

"Transitioning from home to office again is more difficult for some than others."

"Nope, no need to smell the cork."