Recipe Making Pillows

'...mix porridge oats, butter, and golden syrup...Rurghh!...then bake for fifteen minutes'?! Oh well, maybe next lifetime, Delia...'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

"Wouldn't it taste better if you used Bestershire sauce?"

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

'A little piece of advice, Verl. . . cut your sandwich loaf on a diagonal . . . that way people will think they're gettin' more.'

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'I cleaned over thirty fish today.' - 'That takes guts.'

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

Before/After

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

Wendy likes horses...and she is a keen cook.

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Baker Romance

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

"Can you turn these mashed potatoes into french fries?"

In the DNA Kitchen

"Still haven't quite figured out the pressure cooker, huh dad?"

"Karen's idea of wine reduction..."

How to correctly estimate cooking time

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing