Receiving A Tax Rebate Gifts

Tax man presenting a gift.

"The tax office was closed, so I did a little spending instead."

"The 'Condolences on you Bankruptcy' cards are over there and the 'Congratulations on Your Tax Rebate' cards are on aisle 5. . ."

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

'Tax.'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

New For Halloween! Sexy C.P.A.

'...And to spare my relatives the burden of inheritance taxes, I've decided not to give them anything.'

Romney Tax Desk: Accounts Receivable...Accounts Believable.

'Dad's saying he controls my allowance because of something called the Commerce Clause.'

"My accountant said it was a great write off."

'Alf did you see they have frozen the sum you can leave before tax?'

"Mom said I'm her favorite dependent."

'We invested everything we had in our marriage.'

'I see here you're a professional writer. That explains the touch of whimsy in your return.'

'It's not us! It's the government that's living way beyond OUR means!'

Look at the bright side. The I.R.S. says obesity is a disease, so your office visits are tax deductible.

"Let's eat lunch in the park and play 'Guess that Stranger's Tax Bracket.'"

'Did you remember to pay taxes on this?!'

Raising taxes on the rich...a little dab will do ya!!

'I hope he doesn't bring in a belthole tax.'

Hello, Mr Babcock, this is 1983 calling.

'Coffee? Tea? Complimentary orange jumpsuit?'

"I should like a commission on that child tax credit."

"Taxes! We gotta have more taxes!"

HMRC Self-Assessment - Poor

"File for an extension. . . Actually, that's a good idea."

Inland Revenue.

'Your explanation for all these business dinners with my wife better be good!'

"Bigger isn't always better. Unless we're talking deductions."

Vaccine Rollout

'Certainly I expect to deduct the diet clinic. The lean and hungry look is for business purposes.'

'The hours are short, there's no night work, and, best of all, you don't need a fence.'