Reality Show Skeptic Pillows

Crap TV.

'It just doesn't seem right -- a computer-generated reality show.'

'...just a reminder, this really is the news. It's not a movie or one of those reality shows.'

"This isn't a reality show. . . it's the news."

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

"Running is great. Unless you compare it with not running."

"You wanted to miss the Matisse show."

Bad Influence of TV

'That was the worst performance I've ever seen.'

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."

Boss: 'Speak up Smythe, I know you've got an opinion, I told you what it was in my email this morning!'

The first meeting.

Viewer Discretion - Stupid Program.

Go To Sleep Britain...

Warning! The next programme contains no celebrities.

A person is reading another person's thoughts.

"Podcasts, blech. It's like eavesdropping without the intrigue."

'From what I've been hearing about it, I'm not sure I want a grip on reality.'

'Lincoln Standardized Test Center - formerly Lincoln High School'

'The doctor from 'daytime television' said I've got gall stones, but I thought I'd better come to you for a second opinion.'

"When Daddy goes by, make sure he can see how bored we are."

"I just don't get these reality shows!"

Television repeated repeats Awards

"It means this show has been dumbed down to the level of people who couldn't pour water out of a boot, even if the instructions were printed on the heel."

'There's a refreshing honesty about this programme, dear.'

"Let me see you fly around the block a few times - then we'll talk business!"

"Grown men! There's no such thing, Molly."

More Vacuous Reality TV S**e

'The 2 minute hate.'

"I never saved for a rainy day...I grew up shopping in an enclosed mall!"

'I've got nothing against those shows. . . I just wish I had an IQ low enough to enjoy them.'