Realistic Optimist Gifts

'Hi. The Bluebird of Happiness retired. I'm the Bluebird of Things Could Be Worse.'

"Sure you lost your job and your wife and healthwise you're a wreck. But think of the, ummm, the ... okay, maybe I'll just shut up."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

Road Forks in the Road: No Way and Yes Way.

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"You can all unroll yourselves now. We're heading back up."

Optimist

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

Six Thinking Hats

Plan 'A', Plan 'B' - "I say we should go with plan 'A', sir."

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"Things are looking up!"

Smiling Cake: Brave yet stupid pastry...smiled all the way to the small intestine

"I think I can". (train)

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

'Actually, my mom was the first to notice he'd lost that new boyfriend smell!'

"Well, so much for my lucky hat! I've worn it to five interviews and not ONE callback!"

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

Always expect the best

"Don't you worry about me. I always land on my feet."

'The good news is that from now on I belong to a very rare species. There aren't many personnel managers who create their own pink slip.'

"We're having a special today on bright futures."

GLAD-YOU-ATION

Life is like a tube of toothpaste

"I just think things will work out for the best, and by the best I mean me."

'Wow, that is a really big goal!'

Pollyanna, the Hamster

"Today stocks rose on the news that 'down' is a temporary state of mind."

'Next time, Featherton, I'd like to see your sales projections without the clouds.'

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

"The company only made a profit of $2 billion. So that raise you requested will have to wait."

"Oh, don't mind us... We just want to make sure it's really dead."

Ahhh, spring baseball.