Real Estate Wits Pillows

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

'Your honor, if I may digress for a moment, who does your hair?'

"Sold his air rights."

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

Igloo sales

Estate Agents: Executive Homes

Turtle Home

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

"Ok Mr. Bisley, I'll admit it does need a bit of renovation..!"

'This is close enough.'

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

'Well, yes... The cellar IS a bit damp. But therefore the rent is really low!'

'Hi, I'm on the make,'

The King and His Real Estate Advisors

Don't worry dear, he only bites untrustworthy morgage brokers!

'Here's a house that needs fixing up. Are you handy with money?'

"Where do you get your inspiration?"

"Have you seen the walk-in broom closet?"

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

"Like I told you Gladys: location, location, location."

'I'm not the sitting tenant, I'm your husband.'

For Sale By Owner

"This is my 'country house.' I also have a duplex in the city."

For Sale

'There are no skeletons in the closets but you might have troubles with those in the back yard.'

'For added curb appeal, I think you should fill the moat.'

'The meaning of life is location,location,location.'

'Wow, they certainly know how to hide their poverty!'