Real Estate Ponderer Pillows

'Does that mean things are getting better or worse?'

"Their entire friendship is based on regret over property they SHOULD have bought when it was affordable."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"Apparently over 50% of people never look at their pension plans!"

"People are looking for stability in pension arrangements..."

'At least I don't have his life.'

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

"I just learned that my golden parachute was not properly packed."

'Retirement is OK, but instead of looking forword to weekends, I'm working at McDonalds.'

'When bad 401ks happen to good people'

Passing the Pension Time Bomb

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

Star Trek-the Older Generation. . .

Have you seen my money?

'Jerry, The Hermans take the same pharmaceuticals we do!'

"All of my friends are imaginary."

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

"So, tell me what happened after this Schrodinger put you in this box..."

Retirement Issues

"You've got termites."

See the house whose property taxes were raised

"The real trick will be enjoying retirement long enough before the Government goes belly up."

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

"Congratulations you've escaped. Now what?"

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

'Sorry I can't pay your pension until I see gray hair. . . Oh yes, and you also get disability.'

"My inner child just turned 62. Where's his money?"

'You have to admire the way Hartley overcame his honesty and integrity to get to the top.'

"Walter Thruggins, My Life as a Pensions Adviser."