Real Estate Gurus Pillows

' We're last time buyers...'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

Reverse Mortgage.

'We'll convert it into flats and revitalise the area.'

"Of course you're feeling tired - you're in your sub-prime."

'Can we call a realtor now?!'

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

"It's not so much a fixer upper as a tear it downer."

"Sold his air rights."

'The only means of access was via the previous tenant's hair. But not to worry, there's a ladder 'round the back.'

The End of the Property Boom is Nigh.

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

Repossessions

Under New Mismanagement

"The roof is old and leaks. The good news is when it rains you'll get an additional 3 showers."

'This is close enough.'

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us and, even if it was, I doubt either of us could afford to buy a place here given the current sellers' market."

"No dear- I said I was going to buy you a big PROPER TEA!"

See the house whose property taxes were raised

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"Have you seen the walk-in broom closet?"

'Here's a house that needs fixing up. Are you handy with money?'

Affordable housing - Mum and Dads.

Home 'Submerged' Home! (Home value less than mortgage).

'You're an estate agent aren't you?'

"This is my 'country house.' I also have a duplex in the city."

Updated Classic: Bleak House Sales

'Pep's finance' man confused and scared of 'Real estate', 'Gold' etc

"They're willing to throw in their kidneys."

Little Investment on the Praire