Real Estate Follower Gifts

"Food prices up, gas prices about to soar - stocks down - house value down - what's next?"

'Did I mention, that the last owner kept snakes?'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

The stages of gentrification: a guide

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

'For Sale by Neighbor'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

Shares Nosedive

Emigrating to France.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Commerical real estates' man excited by peak in sleeping 'Rental rates' monitor

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

'This condo is the height of luxury, The sprinkler system sprays Perrier,'

America's funniest investment scams

"The sellers had a lot of kids, so they got tired of running out of hot water. So they upgraded."

Home Foreclosed Home.

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.

It was going to be a subdivision, but they ran out of snow. Chilly Hills Estates.

Here We Go Again

'Home equity loan for a pyramid.'

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."