Ready Meal Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Your dinner is in the convenience store."

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

The Aisle

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

Non-wall St merger: Mom's Home Cooking...Pop's Cafe!

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

"Funny how we never seem to run out of vegetables."

'Meat loaf again!'

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

'The health plate is low in sodium, cholesterol, and sugar -- the downside is that it's high in styrofoam.'

"mmmmm. Now that's takeaway the way my mother used to order."

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

"Baldo, I don't like you eating that nasty food!"

'Exactly what is wrong with the pie? I'll have you know I paid a lot of money for that bush meat at the corner shop.'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

'Thaw for 24 hours. They should have told me that yesterday.'

'I don't really hate vegetables, but if I eat them, what's next...GIBLETS?'

'What do you mean, you're not hungry? - Your mother spent two minutes cooking that in the microwave just for you!'

'Pre-washed and pre-cooked I'm okay with but lovingly chewed by devoted carers.....'

"I only make that muck for you, I've ordered myself a pizza."

'I can't believe you cooked this all by yourself...you must have had an accomplice!'

Lady with an inflatable dinner date.

Waiter: 'Your Chicken wings Ma'am.'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

'Wow! That was fast, I only yelled 'Dinner' once!'

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

"Your wife might be a brilliant cook, but my wife orders the world's best pizza!"

"I love home-cooked meals that were made in other people's homes by other people."

Hot Lasagna Transport

"I miss the old days when my mom would pick them fresh."