Reading Obituaries Pillows

"Not a mention and I was chairman of that golf club for over ten years!"

Fifty Shades of Gray

Memoirs: Fiction/Non Fiction.

"According to his will, he wants his outstanding debts to be shared equally between the three of you."

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

Romy Schneider

Cat reading Rommel biography.

Andrea Leadsom's memoirs

Possible Titles For My Upcoming Autobiography

RIP Dr. Tom Kent: In my absence contact Dr. G. Hall

'Yahoo! It says 'Your wife is going to collect a large sum of insurance money!''

I had better days. R.I.P.

"It's a good sign that they asked for Milton Friedman's biography."

"What other kind of day is there up here?"

"He did it my way."

'I'd love to be in Who's Who.'

'Don't look at me. I thought you locked it.'

The late Cretaceous period.

'My 600 pages of grand jury testimony - turn it into a self-serving political memoir.'

"Say, here's something interesting, your old boyfriend is in the paper. . . in the obituaries!"

Editor reasures subscriber that he will get an obituary

Billy Noiviates: 'Stayed In'

'Tell us a little about the father you never knew...'

Books: 'You Must be 21 - Bill's Memoirs, Hillary's Memoirs'

Obituary Writer

"He just sits there all day reading the obituaries and giggling."

'Oh...him...obituary columns as usual.'

"You measured him! Does it shut?"

The end is nigh - Obit.

Obituary Editor

"Why do you read obituaries every day?"

'The New York Times obituaries had some good things to say about you. However, none of them are in this book.'

Fester & Sons Funeral Home: 'Ashes to ashes.'