Reading Bible Quotes Pillows

I don't look like much, but I'm going to inherit the earth.

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'Yes, all at once!'

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

Little Known Moments In History

Adam and Eve toast next to a serpent bartender.

My mother says the bible is full of good people, like Moses, who brought kindness to the world. That alone makes it a worthy basis for morality in today's world. Moses, Numbers 31:9-18(NIV), look it up.

"Hurry! Let's go! The world will be better off without his kind."

"Believe me it's only an apple."

'Well, that's just great...you can part the Red Sea, but you can't open a jar of pickles for me!'

"It doesn't say, Son, whether or not Noah wore a captain's hat."

"I have an app for that."

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

'Psst, Noah - there's a rumour going round that the dodos are gay.'

'Don't you think they'd be better off in the water?'

'This whole Noah's Ark business sounds like a quota system to me!'

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

"Heavens above no, I'm not the angel of the Lord. I'm the landlord from the Angel. I wondered if you fancied a pint."

"Remember, God created you. Evolution will get you left behind."

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

"God's sent us some chocolates."

"Sure he's cute, Lord. . . He's just not what I had a mind for a companion!"

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

Rocket Ark

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

Joseph and his coat

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'